My “defining” insecurity is rejection. Because of several times when I have been hurt by rejection in the past, I tend to live in fear of losing those closest to me. There have been times in my life when I only had one or two close friends (for whom I was, and still am, insanely grateful for.) Now, I am incredibly blessed to have an absolutely amazing circle of close friends, all of whom I would give the world for. My friends could tell me every single day that they love me, that I’m not being replaced, that I mean something to them, but at the end of the day, I’m still terrified of not being loved, of being replaced, of meaning nothing. There have been times when I have driven myself to tears, believing that my best friends - whom I’ve been friends with since second grade - didn’t like me. To put it simply, it’s awful. It recently occurred to me that this is something I should ask God for help for. (Why this never occurred to me before, I have no clue.) I didn’t even have words. All I knew is that it hurt, and I didn’t know what to do. That’s when God showed me that Satan uses my biggest insecurity against me.
God showed me that every time I thought that a friend didn’t like me, it was Satan whispering in my ear. Satan is a liar. There is no better way to get us to believe we aren’t worth anything than to take the things we are the most insecure about, and whisper them into our minds every day. Friends, we have to tell Satan that he is wrong. In the midst of God revealing this to me, I heard Him tell me: “You are loved. I will never reject you.” To me, those are some of the most important words in the world. Because even if all my friends leave me, God will never leave me. Satan tells me I’m unloved, I’m worthy of rejection. God tells me that I’m loved beyond measure, and that I’m worthy of redemption.
I have also learned something else - my worst fear has produced one of my greatest passions. I absolutely love doing things for others. I would do anything to make my friends know that I love them, that they mean something, that I will never leave them. If my biggest insecurity wasn’t the fear that I will be replaced by my friends, making my friends feel loved would never be as important to me as it is. God took something that had the potential to destroy me, and turned it into something that builds others.
Friends, we can’t let our insecurities define us. We can’t hide in fear of these lies Satan tells us for the rest of our lives. If I want to be a teacher, I can’t be afraid my students will reject me. If I want to work with teenage girls, I can’t be scared they won’t like me. We have to find our purpose in God, and know that He, and only He, defines us. I don’t know what your insecurity is. But you do, and God does. And God can take that insecurity and turn it into something beautiful. I pray that everyone who reads this will know that they are more loved than they will ever know by a God who loves them more than the stars He hung in the sky. I pray that you will find strength in our God Who has overcome the world, and can help us overcome our insecurities. I pray that we will stop letting our insecurities define us, and let God define who we are instead. “What great love the Father has lavished upon us, that we should be called children of God. And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know Him.” 1 John 3:1. “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10.